How to Talk About Perinatal Mental Health Concerns with your Family, Spouse or Provider

A guide for parents, partners, and loved ones to start the conversation—gently, honestly, and without shame.

For Parents & Birthing People: Scripts to Ask for Support

You don’t need the “right” words to speak up. These scripts can help start the conversation—with a provider or a loved one.

Talking to a Healthcare Provider:

“I haven’t been feeling like myself lately, and I’m not sure if this is normal. Can we talk about it?”

“I’m struggling emotionally and think I might need some support for my mental health. What would you recommend?”

“I don’t know how to explain what I’m feeling, but something feels off.”

Talking to a Partner, Friend, or Family Member:

“I’m having a hard time and don’t feel okay. I think I need help figuring out what to do.”

“Would you be willing to help me find someone to talk to about how I’ve been feeling?”

“I’m really overwhelmed. Please just listen—I don’t need advice, I just need someone to hear me.”

For Partners, Friends & Family: Scripts to Offer Support Gently

If you’re concerned about a loved one, you can be the person who helps them feel seen—without judgment or pressure.

When Starting the Conversation:

“Hey, I’ve noticed you haven’t seemed like yourself lately. How are you really doing?”

“You’ve been through so much. I just want to check in—what’s been hardest for you lately?”

“You don’t have to go through this alone. I’m here to support you no matter what.”

Offering Help Without Pressure:

“Would you feel okay talking to someone about how you’re feeling? I can help you find someone.”

“I’m not here to fix anything—but I want to listen if you want to talk.”

“What can I take off your plate today to make things a little easier?”

If You’re Concerned About Their Safety or Mental Health:

“I’m really worried about how you’re feeling. Can we call your doctor together and let them know what’s going on?”

“You matter so much. This is bigger than what we can handle alone—let’s find a professional who can help.”

Asking for help is brave.

Offering help is powerful.

You don’t have to wait for a crisis to speak up.

Support can make all the difference—early, gentle, and without shame.